Thriving, Over Surviving

For us, the realization and awareness of our plurality has been grueling at times, and serene at others. Just as our external moods have always seemed to shift in almost Bipolar fashions, our internal barometer is no different. At some point in our life, we became accepting of the fact we were never to be …

Identity and Neuro-Evolution

We have been struggling as of late, not with the daily struggles of living plural, but the identity crisis we are enduring currently. Many neurotypicals, are inclined to believe, and why wouldn’t they, that our identity is inherent; attaching one identity, to one body, to a singular existence. This makes perfect sense, to singlets. For …

Abandonment.

For many years, we were diagnosed as many things. Each alter can present with different symptoms, both physical and mental, leaving the same number of diagnosis’s in their wake. The answer to modern psychiatry, though more advanced than the previous centuries by a little, is psychotropic medications. Highly ineffective for DID. Consistency, is critical in …

Intra-system Relationship Management

The Executive Committee. We are now entering new areas of life, daily, even hourly. We are traveling the uncharted ground of day to day, system management. We try and look at our life as a complex business, that has to be run efficiently, in order to survive. That last bit is critical, as our body …

Happiness Is Not Always Peace

You know, we really wanted, and still want, to work. We know looking back we cannot. We are not really meant to be around people. Our ability to handle the day to day of people, is a fantasy. This is aside from our later physical limitations. We so desired all these years, to be a …

Expression of Self, Vs Knowing Self

As a member of a now defined system, meaning we share a common organic body, there are many instances, when we overtake another boudoirs. in the life of singlets this happens and most people adjust on the fly, or become known as full of shit. Either way leaves a lasting impression on the receiver of …

Wanting to Run Into Nothingness

The unique place that we, and we suspect many, is to find ourselves is trying too ascertain if we are looking into insanity, or peering into rationality from within the crazy. Always standing on the edge of madness, trying to reason from which perspective we are viewing our lives, can fuel the chaos, and deepen …

Redefining Identity, After Complex Trauma Part II

So many of us that suffer from PTSD/cPTSD, and other associated trauma diagnosis, have no idea at all who we really are.  We only have the misinformed ideas we were taught at such young age.  Many of these ideas, contributed to the trauma, or did nothing more than reinforce the negative perceptions we have about …

Moving Into The Future, and Out Of The Past, With Dissociative Identity Disorder. Part I

We have been having a revelation as of late, a seeming push from deep within our system to seek more than what is currently out there.  We feel that maybe, all of the therapy we have had, albeit lifesaving and helpful, is only the beginning to a recovery that is more evolution than repair.  We …

Triggering a Little, And How To Recover

There has been a delay since our last posting.  Our lives have become somewhat more manageable in certain ways.  We have made choices in our lives that are scary, things we would have never done before.  We have ventured into new space as things would seem, or have we?  Are we just merely following our …