Trauma Superstorm Part 3

Part 3. Running Into Darkness We have now exposed and examined the situations that caused the early trauma trifecta. The inability for the child to have an effective baseline of safety and boundaries, the lack of a safe space, either real or perceived, and the radically unstable maternal figure, our mom. Our only solution, to …

Trauma Superstorm Part 2

Part 2 We have now come to the part, where the child has repeatedly been forced to cope with a laundry list of “innocuous horrors”. We use this term, because our parents could be famous quoting to us the many reasons that we were never abused. The verbiage was almost always the same, even though …

Trauma Superstorm Part 1.

Part One. Handmade Victim As an infant. We almost certainly would have been identified INFP-T. The gentle nature would have made us the apparent victim for an experienced abuser. The heir apparent. As a toddler, our reality already shattered, and the emotional, physical and psychological abuse comes to pass from our parents, all the whirl …

DID, Marriage, and Therapy

This is a difficult subject for us to discuss. Even to begin. To try and transpose our food experiences and emotions about this subject, and exhaustive before we even begin. coming to full awareness while in a damaged relationship, is the black hole, of unstable confusion. When we came it be with our wife, now …

Happiness Is Not Always Peace

You know, we really wanted, and still want, to work. We know looking back we cannot. We are not really meant to be around people. Our ability to handle the day to day of people, is a fantasy. This is aside from our later physical limitations. We so desired all these years, to be a …

Redefining Identity, After Complex Trauma Part II

So many of us that suffer from PTSD/cPTSD, and other associated trauma diagnosis, have no idea at all who we really are.  We only have the misinformed ideas we were taught at such young age.  Many of these ideas, contributed to the trauma, or did nothing more than reinforce the negative perceptions we have about …

Moving Into The Future, and Out Of The Past, With Dissociative Identity Disorder. Part I

We have been having a revelation as of late, a seeming push from deep within our system to seek more than what is currently out there.  We feel that maybe, all of the therapy we have had, albeit lifesaving and helpful, is only the beginning to a recovery that is more evolution than repair.  We …

Is Suicide is a better alternative to this….

So, I challenge my readers, to explain to us why living in this fashion, is better than taking the chance that all will come to an end.

Regulating a Bully Alter

Having alters, can be more challenging than the worst spouse or room mate.  They have their own opinions, and once awareness is attained, they also know they have very little accountability for their actions.  For me, the worst part is not being able to leave the room when I need to.  You can never quiet …

the bad seed

Not knowing how to begin this piece, we wanted to speak of many things.  So much is in our consciousness at he moment, needing to erupt into the living world.  So many times we are fearful of the consequences of our thoughts, our desires, of the very feelings that are supposed to define who we …