Thriving, Over Surviving

For us, the realization and awareness of our plurality has been grueling at times, and serene at others. Just as our external moods have always seemed to shift in almost Bipolar fashions, our internal barometer is no different. At some point in our life, we became accepting of the fact we were never to be …

Abandonment.

For many years, we were diagnosed as many things. Each alter can present with different symptoms, both physical and mental, leaving the same number of diagnosis’s in their wake. The answer to modern psychiatry, though more advanced than the previous centuries by a little, is psychotropic medications. Highly ineffective for DID. Consistency, is critical in …

Happiness Is Not Always Peace

You know, we really wanted, and still want, to work. We know looking back we cannot. We are not really meant to be around people. Our ability to handle the day to day of people, is a fantasy. This is aside from our later physical limitations. We so desired all these years, to be a …

Redefining Identity, After Complex Trauma Part II

So many of us that suffer from PTSD/cPTSD, and other associated trauma diagnosis, have no idea at all who we really are.  We only have the misinformed ideas we were taught at such young age.  Many of these ideas, contributed to the trauma, or did nothing more than reinforce the negative perceptions we have about …

Moving Into The Future, and Out Of The Past, With Dissociative Identity Disorder. Part I

We have been having a revelation as of late, a seeming push from deep within our system to seek more than what is currently out there.  We feel that maybe, all of the therapy we have had, albeit lifesaving and helpful, is only the beginning to a recovery that is more evolution than repair.  We …

Triggering a Little, And How To Recover

There has been a delay since our last posting.  Our lives have become somewhat more manageable in certain ways.  We have made choices in our lives that are scary, things we would have never done before.  We have ventured into new space as things would seem, or have we?  Are we just merely following our …

Relationships With Trauma Survivors

For the longest time, we have looked for things in others, we were locking from our childhood.  This was not a conscious search, but like many of us, we were “looking for love in all the wrong places! ” I know, but Johnny Lee could not have said it better, if he himself were a …

Regulating a Bully Alter

Having alters, can be more challenging than the worst spouse or room mate.  They have their own opinions, and once awareness is attained, they also know they have very little accountability for their actions.  For me, the worst part is not being able to leave the room when I need to.  You can never quiet …

the bad seed

Not knowing how to begin this piece, we wanted to speak of many things.  So much is in our consciousness at he moment, needing to erupt into the living world.  So many times we are fearful of the consequences of our thoughts, our desires, of the very feelings that are supposed to define who we …

Get your popcorn and favorite substance, and hang on…….. D.I.D. Romance….

Six Daughters, Two Wives, fourteen personalities, in one body, and only one house.  Yes, you read correctly.  This post is going to address our very complicated, and very real situation we are currently living.  This is the reality of romance and marriage in DID.  This is the living hell/heaven/whatever, that we created, and many times …